( Hexed Against LeeSee )

LeeSee, lovely, find me when you can? I know we haven't had our proper Christmas but I really need to give you this gift. IT'S HERPES.

[Hexed Against Females]
I need advice. Like... Relationship advice. Except every woman I ask is mad and starts going 'aww' and, as much as I love my mum, she's pretty biased on everything.

So LeeSee wants to leave AU. They're discriminating against her because she's a vampire. and I want to hurt whoever did this to her, even if I know it's wrong. When I met her she had this dream of helping Creatures. She knows what she's doing, but she still needs the schooling before she can get a job in Creature Regulations. I don't know what to do. I want to make everything okay for her. I want her to be happy and safe, without fear somebody will try to burn her alive.

I've never loved somebody like I love her. Old World or New. I think I want to make things permanent between us. First though, I want to be sure I can take care of her. Marriage is a pretty serious step, I've heard.
[/End Hex]

[Hexed to the Kaiser]
I hate you. I hate you for allowing somebody like her be hurt. You created this world and divided it into all these different sections. You helped instill the prejudice and now people think it is perfectly acceptable to go around setting places on fire.

People say you're God because you made this place and brought us here. A lot even worship you. You want to play God? Well I hope you know there are people who hate God. Thanks for making a new world, filled with even more prejudice and discrimination than the last. I'd rather have been dead than see somebody I love suffer.

[/Hex]

LeeSee, the visit to the Creature district wasn't that bad. Only one vampire tried to attack me! See!

In other news I've started spending a lot more time with my little girl. Alice really is the most beautiful thing and she's so smart! Mum, seriously, she is smart than me! We're coloring together today. She made you a picture, it's on the fridge.

( Private, Lise and Angie can read )

Guess who is now in the employed field. That's right. I have a job. I was almost hired into porn industry, but then I wasn't sure if Lise would like me having sex with other people. I'm guessing not.

Instead I'm working as a dancer. Brill, isn't it?

So... I found the little girl's mother and we talked. I didn't know kids could come here. A little girl. I have a little girl. She's most definitely mine. I made a lot of mistakes in my old life, but if I had known. They died before me. I had a little girl and she never told me. I would have done something.

Leesee. Mum. Somebody? Why does it feel like the whole world has gone mad?

I just had a four year old come up and call me daddy.

Help?

( Private )

It's good to be home. I need to find a job until next term starts at AU. Not sure which one yet, but I want to commute from home. Course I need to figure out what the hell to go to school forbefore anything.

Lil G knocked up some bitch in the neighborhood. Anybody want some puppies when she delivers?

GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT! HONIES, I'M HOOOOOOOOME!

Yeah, you read that right. I am home. Mum, I bought lunch for us for when you get home. Lil G really did miss me. Now, if a beautiful blond woman would like to see me tonight I'd like her to come to my place.

( NEWT Results Private Angelina )

So far I have:
-Thrown myself at other players in Quidditch matches
-'Corrupted an innocent' by making that kid that was following me snog some girl when we snuck out
-Snuck booze back in and held a party
-Brought drugs back in and held a party
-Told the professors they're all imbeciles who smell worse than a monkey's arse
-Set a Herbology green room on fire

AND THEY STILL WON'T EXPELL ME! WHAT THE BLEEDING FUCK DOES A BLOKE HAVE TO DO TO GET EXPELLED AROUND HERE?

Partying with these idiots is not fulfilling And I haven't been laid in over a month AAAAAAAAAH!

SCHOOL SUCKS AND IS LAME AND I HATE IT AND WHY ARE WE DOING THIS? BLAH BLAH BLAH!

Sorry mates, had to get that out of my system. If it weren't for Quidditch to keep me sane I'D BE RUNNING AROUND LIKE A LOONIE. NOT THAT I DON'T DO THAT ANYWAYS. NOPE. NOT ME. I WOULD NEVER RUN AROUND LIKE A LUNATIC. NEVER. JUST LIKE THERE ARE NOT PICTURES OF ME IN HEELS AND A LITTLE BLACK DRESS WITH A WIG. IMPOSSIBLE. IF THERE WAS THOUGH, I WOULD SAY I LOOKED DAMN FINE AND MY MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD.

Okay, that's out of my system. Promise. So the professors have finally caught on that I know what they are lecturing about so now I have some stupid advanced homework. At least it keeps my interest and I've stopped sending my mini-broom around the class.

HOGSMEADE WEEKEND COMING UP ANYBODY UP TO PARTY?

I've been caught. THE MAN IS HOLDING ME DOWN, MAN! Some professors caught me trying to sneak out yesterday. Now I actually have this creepy little guy following me everywhere. And I mean EVERYWHERE. He's to report if I attempt to run off to school. This is ridiculous. I know this shite. Hell, I looked at the book a bloke who is doing Curse Breaking at Uni has and I remember THAT stuff. I can't remember the details of my life, but I can remember the lessons I learned. This... is SERIOUS SHITE.

The only up side is that I have tryouts for Quidditch tomorrow morning. OI! MUM! I'M GOING FOR BEATER, WHAT DO YOU THINK? I'M GOING TO BE JUST LIKE POP!

Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaally, when you get back do you want to cheer me on during try outs? Maybe that way if somebody tries to bug you while I'm trying out I can accidentally hit them with a bludger.

I GOT MY TATTOO! ISN'T IT AWESOME? IT'S AWESOME!

( SEE MY TATT! )

Yep, that was Jesus. Straight G singing my praise. Oh, and the bloke that did it added some awesome thing beow it. That part has so much going on I sometimes just stare at it for hours. Best. Tatts. Ever!

I don't want to go back to school. Everybody at Beauxbatons all uppity and I have to try to act NORMAL. NORMAL IS OVERRATED!

LIL GANGSTA IS CHEWING UP THE SETTEE! ...Oops.

I love all of you but... YOU'RE ALL BLOODY PSYCHO!

Now that we have that out of the way I only have this to say...

MY MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS THE YARD
AND THEY'RE LIKE, IT'S BETTER THAN YOURS,
DAMN RIGHT, IT'S BETTER THAN YOURS
I CAN TEACH YOU, BUT I'D HAVE TO CHARGE!

( Private to self )

MUUUUUUUUM! I MAY HAVE BROKEN THE TABLE! I WAS DANCING AND THEN BAM IT BROKE. NOT MY FAULT. LIL G DID IT!

I SHOULD BE A DANCER. I LIKE TO MOVE IT-MOVE IT! I LIKE TO MOVE IT-MOVE IT! I LIKE TO. MOVE IT!

Had a bit of java. IT'S WICKED!

I'M FREE! FREE AS A BIIIIIIIIIIIIIRD! Or as free as Lil G. Oi, mum, I'm taking Lil G out for a run! A very long run. A run where I may or may not be visiting friends. HOLY SHITE MUM, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME WE HAD A NEW NEIGHBOUR?

Oh, he's changing. Does he know the curtains are open? No, apparently he doesn't. MUM I'M GOING TO GO GREET THE HOTNEW NEIGHBOUR!

( Private to self )

( Private to Lise )

I. AM. BORED!

T minus seven days and counting until I escape home. I WANT TO PLAY WITH TESTES!

Who thought it was a good idea to make 17 year old boys listen to lectures on our duties in society for several hours and then arts and crafts? They should probably lecture us while we do our arts and crafts. It's more time efficient and we don't have to pretend we're paying attention.

Then again, I just like ARTS AND CRAFTS! Mum, I made you a shiny thing.

( Private to Lee-See )

MUM CAN WE GET A PUPPY NOW? I want a big pitbullo that wil go "Ruff ruff RAR!" and bite people. He'd be a pimp and smooth with all the bitches. HEY! I can't get in trouble for that word because it actually means female dog. Wicked, innit?

When I get back from NARA I demand there to be a puppy. An awesomely badarse puppy.

I'm gonna go learn how to shoot at things now. Kaybye!

Ladies and gentlmen, boys and girls, people who may identify with no gender whatsoever... I am the one. The only. FRED! Except not really. I don't think my Uncle is here though. Is he? OI IS THERE AN UNCLE FRED HERE? If not I want to file a complaint. There's not enough Weasleys on this thing. CAN I GET A WEASLEY ROLL CALL?

These things are wicked. Who came up with them? They need a raise. A big raise. And wine. A big raise, wine, and maybe to be given a pat on the back. Person who came up with these thingies I am sending you a pat on the back through my mind.

Oi, Mum! MUM! MUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM! MOTHER DEAREST AND RULER OF ALL THINGS WHICH ARE AMAZING IN OUR HOME? PAY ATTENTION TO ME! You know that big clunky thing you call a trophy? I broke it. Now, before you get mad, I didn't mean to break it. It attacked me. It was all like "Rawr I'm gonna eat your face!" and I was like "No, Mr. Trophy, you ain't badarse enough. I can take ya." Mr. Trophy didn't listen. So now he's in two parts and I'm not touching him. Nope, refuse to.